The Summer I Started Learning

In March of 2010, I stopped going to college. I didn't even technically drop out, I just stopped going and didn't sign up for spring classes. The last day of my last winter class, I immediately caught a flight to Florida for my "spring break", although I wouldn't be returning to school after I got home. It was more like the beginning of my seven month "summer". I visited my oldest sister and my best friend. Spending ideal time with each of them, while with my sister I learned that you can have everything without having a constant significant other. You can own a house, have a great job, have fun with friends, drive a decent vehicle, and be independent. While with my best friend, I learned that family is there for you when the world turns its back. Things can get hard, but its never any more than you can handle. I learned that beauty resides in nature, and you can't buy happiness. Happiness is a sunset under the causeway, dimly lit by streetlights, sipping on Captain and Coke with those you hold dear, watching a dolphin break the surface of the water.
In the following months at the ripe eighteen years of age, I learned what lust, infatuation, and love was. I was made to feel special and important in a way I had never felt before. I began to care about another person and make them a priority in a way that frightened, yet excited me. I learned about intimacy and how one person can make your whole day better without saying one word at all. It began with lust, the newness of someone intriguing, attractive, and interested in you. Lust turned into infatuation. Infatuation with the way he showered me with attention, gifts, and the butterflies that fluttered in my stomach when I was with him. It was the first time a man made me his priority, the first time I was treated like a lady instead of "one of the guys". Infatuation turned to love, although it was short-lived. Love made us long for each other in each passing moment apart. We needed one another to get through the day. Our time together was more precious than any other person, event, object, or activity.
Eventually our infatuation phase wore off. When this happens, hopefully you're left with trust, passion, and a deeper level of love than you knew before. Unfortunately this wasn't the case for us. We wouldn't talk for days, and neither of us got upset. We didn't "need" or miss each other when we were gone. We were different people with different goals and prospective life paths, and were just starting to realize it. It changed from an I-can't-sleep-without-you-near-me feeling to an I-kinda-wish-I-was-with-my-friends feeling. In May, we broke it off.
This being said, I learned that you can't define yourself by another person. You shouldn't have to change yourself to fit into the mold someone else makes for you. I also learned what true heartbreak is like. It's sort of like having broken ribs. On the outside it appears as if nothing is wrong, but every breath hurts. Sometimes love just isn't enough. Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it's better to just leave it broken rather than hurt yourself trying to put it back together.
After this I learned how blessed I am to have the circle of friends that I've acquired from the restaurant where I work. My coworkers were nothing short of amazing to me through really tough times. They took me out and made me have fun, got me out of my sweatpants, and threw me back into the world with them. They helped me self-medicate, drank away my sorrows with me, smoked away my negative thoughts, let me sleep on their couches, cry on their shoulders, and pour my heart into their ears. There to save me from dangerous situations I put myself in, make me laugh when I wanted to cry, and encourage me to try new things, they helped me get back to myself. Never did I feel alone. I learned that friends can make a chosen family.
My 19th birthday fell towards the end of May, and my friends made it worth it when my original plans had to be rescheduled. You know someone loves you when they let you crash on their couch with your five pound bag of sour patch on the bathroom floor, your Jack Daniels at your feet and a barf bag near your head. My celebrations continued into the next week, where I learned that burning your parents' furniture in an act of revolt is NEVER a good idea, as good as it may feel in the moment. I was barely at home for three consecutive days, coming home after I knew they were asleep and leaving in the morning before they awoke. My father ceased to speak to me until a week and a half later. Don't burn furniture that isn't yours!
May turned to June and June to July, in which I mostly worked my ass off at the restuarant during the days and partied with coworkers well into the night. I learned not to sleep with anyone in your circle. I learned that not only do you pray before you eat, we pray before we bong. I learned that drinking Jack Daniels straight probably isn't the best idea. Always bring a sleeping bag. I learned that shots of tequila make me throw up at work the next day and give me panic attacks at night. I learned that you should never try to cut your hair while intoxicated, or text, call someone, walk, basically anything that requires cognitive thought and logic should be out of the question.
There is a God and he works at McDonald's.
I learned that sometimes you can trust people that you never thought of confiding in. You have at least one thing in common with every person on this earth.
August brought changes, and many of them. A best friend of mine moved far away, financial and health related hardship struck my family, and the majority of aspects in my life became unstable, stagnant, or unreliable. School started up for many students, and I found myself with tons of free time when my peers were getting prepared to move forward in thier lives and careers. I ended up panicking and running back to the same private community college from which I originally ran away from. I threw myself into it all the way, taking enough classes to be considered full time this year and scheduling my classes so I can work as much as possible.
September rolled around, and started off with a bang. In the first week I went to one last party, and ended up getting an M.I.P. because someone called the cops. I blew a whole .03 on a breathalyzer test I wasn't aware that I could have refused. Don't drink in large numbers, especially with people underage, even if you are included in this category. You are safer with your elders. Tuesday smokedowns and video game tournaments came to a rolling stop, along with parties on weekdays, disc golfing(I learned I cannot physically throw a disc or mentally care about where it lands when in altered states of consciousness) and gathering around a t.v. on Sunday nights to watch HBO. This week was my first week of classes, along with working six days this week, I've been forced to learn and exercise good time management skills, and take care of myself better.
The start of classes marks the end of my seven month summer, in which I have never learned so much in such a short time. I've never been so thankful for my trails and tribulations. Here's to a successful school year, a more mild way of life, and learning from our mistakes.